Oh, I see, this is all historic “yada, yada, yada”. ;\
Side note: XMPP-OTR is not really usable, outdated, and also has non-optimal security properties.
It only makes sense to compare modern protocols, providing E2E-encryption based on the “double ratchet” cryptographic scheme, i.e. XMPP-OMEMO (about 10 years old) and the Matrix protocol (newer, but fundamentally the same).
Some protocols of centralised services also use the “double ratchet” cryptographic scheme, e.g. Signal.
Yes, the metadata of communications is still distributed over many servers.
But that is the case for the centralised services too, as they only appear to be a single (logical) server (address): All bigger players distribute their servers geographically for load-balancing and fail-safety.
P.S.: If you are looking for a trustworthy, modern chat system with multiple, well working, FLOSS client and server implementations (plural for both!), there is only one: XMPP (“Jabber”).
You might want to take a look at the XMPP-clients Conversations (Android), Dino (GTK, Unix/Linux), Gajim (Windows, MacOS, Linux), etc. and the XMPP-servers ejabberd and prosody. For sure there are many more, but most of them are not in a production-ready state (as you already experienced with the Matrix client and server).
Plus there is a lot of documentation, many running servers to host one’s account, a large community and the biggest user base of all non-centralised chat-solutions.